


something has happened to your world

by blastellanos



Category: Baseball RPF
Genre: Homophobia, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-20
Updated: 2017-12-20
Packaged: 2019-02-17 08:28:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13073052
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blastellanos/pseuds/blastellanos
Summary: The fastball that pegs him in the head isn’t an accident.





	something has happened to your world

The fastball that pegs him in the head isn’t an accident. Even though pain explodes white hot behind his eyelids and he drops to the dirt, hands coming up instinctively, he doesn’t forget the look in Arrieta’s eyes before he let the pitch go. Pure hatred in glittering dark black. Nick clutches at his head and tries to clench his teeth against the pain. It’s hard. It hurts so bad and he finally is able to struggle up to his knees.

Trainers come out and test him, he waves them off– he doesn’t have a concussion– and he takes his base, gritting his teeth and blinking through the fuzziness he can feel. He doesn’t really remember what happens after, just that he’s back in the dugout and then he’s back in the clubhouse, getting looked at further. 

“Yeah, it’s a concussion,” Nick says to the trainer, who diagnoses it as such and sends him on. He’s out for a couple of games. 

***

His own teammates aren’t outwardly bad, but he knows some of them are less than forgiving. Less than understanding. He tries to ignore it, but it’s hard. When people that he once respected and loved are sideeying him, calling him _fag_  and not under their breath. 

Nick is fine– he can handle it– he thinks about the reasons that he did it and soothes himself like that. Whatever else, his kid isn’t going to grow up in a world where he felt like he couldn’t unapologetically be himself. Nick wants to live in that world too, but it isn’t easy. 

He’s surprised, too, by his teammates who support him. Ones who do get moved away– his old friends– Alex and J.D., then all three of the Justins are gone too and it feels lonelier. 

But James sticks up for him to Alex Wilson and it doesn’t quite make sense, doesn’t quite come to blows. 

“Honest, it’s fine,” Nick says to James. He doesn’t understand why James looks at him like that. 

***

The Tigers lose in an unspectacular fashion– but Nick knows what it means. They’re trying to peg someone out at third whose stealing, and he slides in to third, cleats up and spikes into Nick’s leg– and it’s ruled as “unintentional” but he knows it’s not. 

He stays in, even though his ankle is screaming at him. 

“That’s what you get,” Mauer says as he dusts off his pants, and Nick just punches his fist in to his glove. Mauer manages to get in– a sac fly walkoff. He walks back to the dugout, but James waits for him by homeplate. 

“You okay?” He asks and Nick shrugs. 

“I’m fine.” 

***

A knock at his hotel room startles him. He’s just finished facetiming with Liam and he scratches the back of his neck and stands up. James is at the door and he pushes his way in. 

“Oh sure, make yourself at home,” Nick says. 

“Thanks,” James says and he turns to face Nick as Nick shuts the door. 

“You’re in danger,” James says to Nick. Nick frowns. 

“It’s just assholes, McCann, nothing to do about it. I’m fine.” 

James frowns, his blue eyes looking a little distant for a minute. James steps over to Nick and settles his hands on his shoulders. Nick looks at James. 

“I’m worried.” 

“Honestly, James, I’ll be fine.” 

James slides his hands from his shoulders, to settling against the sides of his neck. Nick bites his lower lip and feels his cheeks flush. 

“You’re brave,” James says, thumbs stroke over the soft skin at his throat, “You’re so brave and you don’t even realize it.” 

James pulls Nick into a hug, tucks his head against Nick’s shoulder. James reaches up and rubs his hands over James’s back gently. 

“It’s gonna be alright,” Nick says and he wraps James up and sighs, pressing a kiss to his temple. He feels like– something strange, some coiling feeling, and James holds him back. They stay like that for a few moments and then James steps back. 

Nick smiles crookedly at James– “You wanna stay for a drink?” 

James takes his coat off and rolls up his sleeves. Maybe it wouldn’t feel so lonely now.


End file.
